I wake to find the day cold, dreary, silent. Abandoned I find myself alone. As I begin to focus, the senses kick in and the pain begins to rush upwards toward my brain. As it rises, every organ awakes in pain. Within moments I am alive. Or am I? Is this life? I hope not.
The mind is racing now. Replaying conversations. Obsessing over guilt. This adds to the pain. Emotional pain. Paranoia begins to plant its daily seeds. ” Whom will I lose today?” The body then begins to tremble. The shakes. Leg tremors. Arm spasms. At times; miniscule convulsions. A reminder that the body is now awake. Reality. Now the senses awake. Vision slowly focuses. Never knowing if it will complete the cycle or stall part way there, leaving the day out of focus. Someday’s in complete darkness. Hearing will begin to creep in. Sudden high pitch noises. Continuing throughout, competing with the noises of the day. Breathing comes slow, painful with each breath, labored as each breath is fought for.
This is today; This is tomorrow; This is eternity. One more moment. One more day. A day like all the others.
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